Brush with the Law

fucK.

the cab i was riding home was apprehended by a policeman because of a stupid move that i actually asked him to dO. i didn't know that it's illegal to make a u-turn in front of St. Luke's. the policeman was pointing at a sign so small, and so covered by leaves from an overhanging tree that it would be near impossible to see it unless you have x-ray vision that can see through stupid leaves. are they doing this intentionally so they can net more unwitting victims?

anyway what surprised me was how calm the driver's demeanor was after the factT. he was actually pissed off at the policeman and not at me! ha! i felt sooo guilty. i caused it for cryin out loud! we could have gone straight along 32nd Avenue and made a right at 34th, but i told him to make a uwie because it would be faster. here i was expecting him to harangue me into paying for his 500+ peso ticket.

he was actually laughing jovially that the policeman didn't accept his bribe and didn't fall for his "i'm kumpare with so and sO". all he got from the officer was 'just give me your license' and 'no, i don't know him'.

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when i drive, my biggest fear is not to careen off and hit someone (not that i don't care about a life, but because i know i'm careful enougH). my biggest fear is to get apprehended by the law. thank god it has never happened in my relatively young life as a motorist. the closest i got was a smirk from a disgruntled MMDA because i crossed the yellow lane but i quickly switched lanes again (cause i saw him. haha).

the law evokes a certain dread in mE. i remember this one time when my ex and i was almost brought in (in tagalog: bagansya) by men in brown. it was his fault. he wanted to part somewhere dark and secluded. so we went to UP. we found a perfect spot near the Engineering building. no, not to do the nasty (hello? we got a place to do that in), but to have those intimate prayer studies. yup. true story! he was a practicing neo-buddhist and he wanted to tell me about his beliefs.

2 hours into a subliminally captivating conversation, bright lights were shone on his caR. then the blaring sounds of the siren. three rotund men-in-brown gawking at us like we were fresh kill. they asked us to step out of the car and interrogated us like we killed Ninoy. they even asked if we can go with them to the precinct to explain. it was such a horrific experience. good thing my ex had a very prominent last name. and he's a parseltongue. he knows how to speak to snakes. that's what those mo-fos were! they were only harassing us to get some dough. but we didn't give in. all it took was a very convincing call to a tito of his in the government. he even had them talk to him over the phone. their tones changed after the call. they decided to leave us alone.

after they slithered away, my ex goes 'ang galing ni Bryan no?' in between a snickeR. 'tito from the government' turned out to be our faggot friend who can do such a mean impression of a politician. i tell you, down to the dot.

we laughed our heads off and i promised to treat B to whatever he likes. we were joking about it but still, at the back of my mind i was so scared. probably even scarred for life. there was a point when they were already asking for our IDs. he gave his, but for the life of me, my fingers literally froze and i can't get to my wallet. i can not begin to imagine the embarrassment this would have caused my family and his family had we not had Bruha, i mean Bryan.

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ever since then, i've been an advocate of the NO BRIBE, NO SCUM belief. i swear: if i fucked up, it's my fault, i'll own up to it. we are already so far up the list of the most corrupt countries in the world, let's not aspire for the topmost position. you may be just one in millions of motorists plying the road everyday and running into the law. but imagine if we can end the perpetuation of this very embarrassing pinoy trait by actually not being the root cause. i want to be the change.

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that public service announcement was brought to you by the letter N. N for nagmamalinis.

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think about it, though. there are other ways to get out of a tough situation as long as you're in the right, right?

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the drive home was pleasant. manong driver was still so pitiful though. i decided, on top of my bill, to just shoulder half of the expense he'll be cashing out at city hall. it's the very LEAST i can do.

he even said thank you in the most sincere tone i've ever heard from a manong driver.

that was my cookie for the day. i can now sleep with a smile.

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and to share the smile:

now lemme hear the collective cussing of: "muthafucker mga jejemons na yan! ini-invade nila tayo! i swear, i wanna make them sagasa with my (insert sasakyan here)!"